Quiz · 8 questions · 1 minute
How do you feel loved? A love language quiz
Eight quick questions about what makes you feel cared for. Take it on your own, then send it to your partner and compare. Nothing you pick leaves this page.
Question 1 of 8
The five ways, in short
- Kind words: What’s said really matters.
- Time together: Being there is the gift.
- Physical affection: Closeness you can feel.
- Thoughtful gestures: It’s the thought that counts.
- Help with everyday things: Actions speak louder.
Where love languages come from
The idea comes from the marriage counsellor Gary Chapman and his 1992 book The Five Love Languages. This isn't his official assessment: it's our own short quiz, with our own names for the five ways, and it's the same one you'll find in La Brasa.
What the research says
In 2024 the psychologists Emily Impett, Gideon Park and Amy Muise reviewed the studies on love languages and found little support for the book's main claims. Most people value all five ways rather than just one, and one study they cite found that every kind of loving gesture went with a happier relationship, whatever a person's favourite was. Their image: love is less a single language than a balanced diet. So treat your result as a conversation starter, not a label. It tells your partner what lands most, not the only thing that counts.
Take it together
Send the quiz to your partner and compare. Then each of you picks one small thing from the other's result to try this week.
Another quiz: What’s your spice type?
Questions
What are the five love languages?
In Gary Chapman's book they are words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. This quiz calls them kind words, time together, thoughtful gestures, help with everyday things and physical affection.
Is this the official love language quiz?
No. The official assessment belongs to Gary Chapman's 5 Love Languages. This is La Brasa's own short quiz, the same one that's in the app, and every result says so.
Are love languages backed by science?
Not strongly. A 2024 review of the research found little evidence that people have one main love language or that matching your partner's matters much; most people value all five. They're still a useful way to talk about what makes each of you feel cared for.
How do you find out your partner's love language?
Ask them to take the quiz and compare results. Then ask when they last felt really cared for: a specific answer tells you more than any label.
Sources
Try it with your partner
La Brasa is a private app for couples: rate ideas on your own, see only what you both want, answer a daily question and play games for two. Free on Google Play.